Idle and Blessed

God is definitely trying to teach me some things about the story of Jesus. This semester in Greek Readings we are translating the Gospel of Matthew, in Advanced Greek we are now translating the Gospel of Mark, and in church we are making our way through Luke. And in one of my classes last semester, we spent about 10 weeks studying John... It's a good thing, because I'm far less familiar with the Gospels than the rest of the New Testament (and it's slowly dawning on me that I am pretty unfamiliar with the Bible in general, if I'm honest with myself). And the Lord knows that sometimes I don't pay attention to subtleties and need a huge neon sign to recognize what he's showing me. Hence, randomly studying all four Gospels at the same time. It's really amazing to realize the urgency with which all four of these writers told their story. They weren't writing a novel in their spare time, and they weren't taking on a new project after retiring from their 9-...

Relationships are so complicated in college. I've noticed recently, observing my surroundings, how strong the need to pair up can be in this season of life. I've always been ok being single (which is fortunate, because I've been single 99% of my life), but there are certain environments and situations that make me question the value of singleness. Without fail, when someone I know starts dating, gets engaged, gets married, or complains about not experiencing any of these three, I start to wonder what's wrong with me, and why I'm not experiencing them. This is a powerful testament to the influence of the people you spend time with, really. But back to the point. Josh showed me a poem once that I always think about when I find in myself a desire to be in a relationship. Here are some lines from it: No, not until you are satisfied, Fulfilled and content with being loved by Me alone, With giving yourself totally and unreservedly to Me. With having an intensely personal ...

'But what of the poor [people] who never get into [heaven] at all?' 'Everyone who wishes it does. Never fear. There are only two kinds of people in the end: those who say to God, "Thy will be done," and those to whom God says, in the end, " Thy will be done." All that are in Hell, choose it. Without that self-choice there could be no Hell. No soul that seriously and constantly desires joy will ever miss it. Those who seek find. To those who knock it is opened.' -C.S. Lewis, The Great Divorce I've been thinking about C.S. Lewis' book The Great Divorce , which I've been almost done with for a while now. It's a vision of heaven and hell, which is interesting, but it's mostly valued because it's a fascinating insight into Lewis' eschatology and soteriology. All throughout the book there is this idea of dragging people kicking and screaming to heaven. I mean, not literally, but that's the idea. Supposedly the people in h...

I went to chapel this morning. This particular one was sponsored by the Religion and the Arts department, and it was called "Worshiping God with our Bodies." It was a mixture of dance performance, Scripture reading, prayer, choir, and speaking, all centered around this phenomenon of worshiping God with physical movement, embodying worship. I soaked it up, for a few reasons. For one, because I generally think the arts at Belmont are way too restricted to musical arts and the chance to experience dance is rare here. Another reason is because I have come to respect and adore dance in the past year of working with dancers at the pilates studio. But also, because of something one speaker said about worship that struck me. I don't remember her exact words, but she said something to the effect of, "I do not have a body; I am a body. What I do with my body is a form of worship. What am I doing to keep my body strong? How am I respecting it and caring for it? This is my offer...

I wonder what the world would be like if everyone studied, acted, served, and lived inside their gifting. I'm almost a week into my fourth semester at Belmont, and I've been thinking a lot about passions and gifting this week. Because I'm noticing a profound shift in how I view school, a shift that I think has a lot to do with what I'm studying now. This is my first semester with NO gen. ed. classes - just classes that I chose, classes that have to do with my major and minor. Really, it's my dream semester. Who wouldn't love taking Advanced Greek, Greek Readings, Russia and the Soviet Union Since 1900, Intermediate Russian II, and World Religions?? It turns out, a lot of people. A whole lot of people. Like, basically everyone I talk to looks at me like I'm insane for loving these classes. Maybe I am, but it's so great to get up in the morning and look forward to a day of classes, homework, and conversation about God, Russia, Russian, Greek, the Bible, an...

My two greatest strengths are fear and planning. Ok, yes, I know fear is not a good thing, but I'm super strong at it. So I'm still counting it... Anyway, It follows that I absolutely adore New Years...all the resolutions, plans, and universal fear of those resolutions remaining unkept. Michael asked us at church this weekend to think about three things that have sucked about 2010, and three ways the Lord has blessed us. As much as I love planning for the new year and looking ahead, looking back and reflecting is such a wonderful thing. I like to see growth in my life, the kind of growth that happens over whole years, so slowly it's not perceivable until you look way back on it. One of the most hopeless feelings to me is the feeling that nothing is ever going to change for the better, that I am never going to change for the better, or never going to be in the place I want to be. It's hard to still those thoughts without some kind of life experience indicating the opposi...

The last days of the semester and the prospect of upcoming finals week are kicking my behind. Oh how I want to be home, in my room, under the covers, watching The OC for days on end... 3 classes, 2 exams, 1 paper, 1 project to go. I'll try not to curl up in the fetal position anywhere on campus. This Christmas break better be so amazing, because I'm going to need a lot of amazingness to get the tension out of my shoulders that has been stuck there permanently since August. So David and Larry are going to Karachaevsk in January to facilitate some conflict resolution and leadership training. Do you realize how difficult it is going to be for me to NOT pull a Harriet the Spy mission and get on that plane?? I guess the hiccup would come later, when trying to get past the impenetrable Russian immigration lines without being seen...I'm trying to think like Harriet and find a way around that. Because I really want to see my families. I keep having dreams that I'm with them, bu...