Idle and Blessed

This morning I pulled last summer's prayer journal off the shelf. I don't know why, but I felt like I needed to read through it. As soon as I opened it I was immediately catapulted back in time to the day I left for my two months in Russia. June 4, 2010. Impossible to believe that was almost exactly a year ago. It all started to come back to me as I looked through the pages of that journal. The confidence I felt as I left. The prayers I prayed with confidence that God was about to fulfill them. The excitement and nervousness of traveling alone to a part of the world very difficult to get to. After a few pages, the entries turned to prayers for specific people and situations. My memories came back as snapshots in my brain - the two major meltdowns I had, getting my own little apartment in Kislovodsk, talking to Venera, riding in hot taxis to see orphaned children. Allergic reactions all the time. Language burier. Missing Fido, Target, home, friends. June 8, 2010: "I feel co...

I am so richly blessed. It feels like school ended ages ago, even though it's only been 2 weeks. This summer so far has been restless for me, and I feel like I'm in a season of life I've never had to deal with before. Unlike the summers of high school, I am not nestled into the routine of four school years with two months of free time in between, living at home because that's the only place to live and just waiting for high school to end. There are too many variables and options now to think about things that way. Unlike the summer between high school and college, I am not preparing for the big lifestyle shift of moving out, bonding with old friends one last time, or reminiscing about my ending childhood. Unlike last summer, I am not packing, traveling, and spending months across the globe. This summer there is no definition, at least not one I have found yet. That's not to say it's a bad thing, but I feel like there's nothing I'm working towards, nothin...

I'm officially done with my sophomore year of college. Exams are done, papers are done, friends are dispersed for the summer (or some for good), the dorm is empty, and my stuff is moved back into my room at home. Last year this time I had a 3-month visa to Russia and a suitcase already being packed. I was glad to know I'd never be a college freshman again, glad to know I was a fourth of the way done so I could just think about mission work. This year I'm stalling on the decision of whether or not to apply for an extended visa, sad to know I'll never be an underclassman again (well, kinda sad...), and amazed that I'm already half way done with undergrad. People say your freshman year is the most formative, but I have to disagree. My sophomore year was by far the most formative of the two. Thank goodness I met Micah early in the year, who told me it was normal to have a complete crisis of existence as a sophomore. There were times I wanted to transfer, times I wanted ...